Polyglot
by StriderAndVargas
Summary: Oh my Lordy Lord Merry Christmas. This fic has been the longest coming I have *ever* done but now it's here as a Christmas present for anyone who happens upon it. Here's to more shit in 2016! (This is unadulterated smut)


"Vi vil gjerne komme! Så fredag kl 09:00 da?"  
There was a pause, as whoever was on the other end replied. None of this did Homestuck any good however, as the language was something that definitely wasn't English. The words entertained him however, his matesprit's speech accompanied by odd little sounds he never would've heard him make otherwise. He couldn't place what language it was, but that also didn't matter all that much. Hetalia and the stranger on the phone's words rang in his ears as he held the other landline to his ear, contentedly listening.  
"Høres bra ut, jeg er så spent!"  
The other voice spoke again, which sounded like a female who could've been around their age, or slightly older. He stayed silent, waiting for Hetalia's reply.  
"Det har vært fint å snakke med deg også, farvel!"  
Another "farvel!" echoed in his ears and he let out a sigh. The click of the receiver on the other end brought him back to reality as the words stopped. Another click followed by loud beeping caused him to end the call from his end, as he waited for Hetalia to pick up the receiver in the next room over again. Once again it rung and another nameless faceless voice began speaking in a completely different language. This one was much less raucous, and... sexy? He really shouldn't be turned on by this, as languages were languages and there shouldn't be anything hot about them. His body however, said differently as he bit his lip and tried to ignore the growing pressure against his jeans. He instead focused on what was being said, trying not to make a sound as Hetalia talked on with this new stranger.  
"Davvero? Com'è? Vorrei poter sono stato lì, suona davvero divertente!" It was the way he rolled the Rs, he decided. It sounded natural, and also unbearably hot. Due to this fact, he was unsuccessful in his silent endeavor, and let out a short sound. Before he realized what had happened, Hetalia's voice took on a different tone.  
" Sono abbastanza sicuro che il mio fidanzato è in ascolto in questo momento. Mi dispiace tanto, posso richiamare più tardi?"  
A short reply.  
"Grazie, ciao." It was when the receiver was hung up, and stomping could be heard from above him that Homestuck realized how utterly fucked he was. His matesprit's steps were quick and heavy as he came down the stairs, likely furious with him. If he knew anything about Hetalia however, it was that when he got emotional he couldn't hold a single language for longer than a sentence or two, and that fact turned him on even more. A yell came from outside his door.  
"Homestuck, what the hell? Cad a thug tú an smaoineamh gur féidir leat ag éisteacht i ar mo chomhráite teileafóin? What are you doing?" As fast as he'd said it, the door was open. Homestuck made a grab for one of the bed's pillows to hide his "problem" as Hetalia stepped into the room. Rage quickly melted into confusion as it was fairly obvious why the pillow was on his boyfriend's lap. He was silent for a moment, before Homestuck spoke.  
"Uh, shit. I honestly don't have an explanation for this." More silence.  
"Wait, how could I possibly have been turning you on? I was talking about vacations."  
"What language were you speaking?"  
"Italian, wait a second. Do other languages turn you on?" He strained not to glance down at the pillow. There was another long moment of slightly awkward silence as Homestuck wondered why the most trivial conversation in any language that wasn't his own was even slightly arousing, much less extremely so.  
"I guess so. I didn't notice until just now, though."  
"How could you not have noticed? I speak other languages all the time!"  
"I don't know!" Suddenly, the look of confusion turned to a smirk.  
"So I could say anything at all and it would make you hot?" The smirk grew, and that worried Homestuck. He already had a 'problem' that demanded his attention, and now Hetalia knew how to turn him on even further. He sauntered into the room, shutting the door behind him. His tone changed from a casual, if not confused tone to low and sultry in a matter of seconds, the words floating from his lips returning to the Romantic tongue.  
"Perché non si rimuove quel cuscino, sì?" He couldn't tell what his matesprit was saying, but judging by his body language, he could make a fair guess. He pushed the pillow off to the side, leaving himself completely vulnerable.  
"Non è che una migliore piccola?" It was the way he said the words, like he didn't want to let them go. He savored every syllable as he closed in on Homestuck. Without giving his boyfriend a moment of thought, he pulled him in for a kiss. Immediately he began to nip at Homestuck's lower lip, demanding entry. He was granted it and his tongue slipped inside, exploring every area of his mouth as he had before too many times to count. He dug one hand into the bedsheets, the other running through his boyfriend's obsidian locks. He could feel himself growing just as turned on as Homestuck as his jacket was slipped from his shoulders, falling to the floor soundlessly. He eventually pulled away to take a breath, and Hetalia spoke again.  
"Je veux que vous enlevez votre chemise pour moi, d'accord?" His breath was hot on his boyfriend's neck as his hands ghosted along his sides to the hem of the black tee shirt. Slender hands tugged at the garment until it too was discarded on the floor. Emerald eyes were clouded over by lust as he went to latch his mouth to Homestuck's neck. He was stopped however, by a chiding grey finger.  
"Not until you take your shirt off." He let out a short groan as he did so, stripping himself of the fabric and leaning in once again. This time he was abruptly tossed onto the bed as Homestuck took up the position over him. He leaned into the brunette's neck, kissing and sucking and nipping down both sides as Hetalia's breath came in short gasps. Once he'd left 12 marks that were already blossoming into bruises he seemed satisfied, Hetalia whimpering lightly as he pulled away. However he soon regained some of his composure, sitting up to start speaking again.  
"Enlevez vos pantalons maintenant." His voice was a low, sensual purr and Homestuck understood immediately. He began to work at his pants before pale hands grabbed grey ones, pulling them away to work on them himself. He paused however, as his hand brushed the inner thigh, causing Homestuck to shiver and let out a low moan.  
"O quê? Você gosta disso?" His hands continued to play at the button, seemingly moving as agonizingly slow as possible in an attempt to elicit as many sounds as he could. Eventually those hands successfully undid the button, and stripped them to the floor. Now Homestuck was truly vulnerable, and Hetalia knew that as he snaked a hand behind his neck, pulling him into another kiss. Homestuck's hands wandered, running over every bruise at his neck, and down his shoulders and every curve and ridge of his spine, causing Hetalia to arch and shiver into his touch. He pulled away for a breath, causing Hetalia to whimper lowly and make an attempt to pull his neck closer once again. He denied him however, and drew closer to fiddle with his boyfriend's pants for a moment before sliding them down onto the carpet soundlessly. A smirk tugged at his lips and he reached a hand down to pull at the band of his boxers, going just as agonizingly slow as Hetalia had, causing the blush that played over his cheeks to darken further and for his toes to curl with every featherlight touch as short moans and gasps slipped past his lips. He eventually reached the waistband, toying with it for another agonizing moment before tugging them off as fast as possible. It amused him that Hetalia was now even more vulnerable than he. Homestuck took advantage of this of course, trailing thin fingers down his matesprit's inner thighs, grinning as he spluttered for words around gasps and sighs. He'd always been told he'd had skillful fingers.  
"S-stop b-b-being such a fucking t-tease 'Stuck."  
"So we're speaking English for once? Too bad I can't quite hear you. What was that?" Now his hand was purposely brushing over Hetalia's dick, turning the quivering sighs into moans that he tried desperately to stifle into his palms.  
"I still can't hear you." The words caused Hetalia to remove his hand.  
"Y-Y-You're b-being a-a-" the words were stuttered and heavily accented and almost impossible to decipher. To top it all off, even his breathing seemed louder than his voice.  
"What was that 'Talia?"  
"J-just please-"  
"Please what?" Homestuck's movements were becoming harsher, more often than not brushing against it now. Hetalia was silent for a split second, ragged breathing seeming to be the only sound he could make at that point.  
"IK WIL DAT JE ME IN DE KONT NEUKEN JUIST NU MET UW TENTAKEL LUL. ALSJEBLIEFT OH GOD, STOP PLAGEN EN NEUKEN ME RAUW REEDS." The words came out in a needy mess of yells and moans as Homestuck's tongue flicked over the stray curl that he knew all too much about. By this point he didn't know or care what Hetalia had said, but it was extremely hot and was causing his bulge to squirm in anticipation, dripping electric green fluid onto the sheets. He gets behind Hetalia, breath hot on the smaller fandom's neck as the yelling quiets to groans and stuttered complaints he couldn't understand, as they were in Hungarian. What he did understand however, was the fact that Hetalia was now grinding his hips into Homestuck's. His face wore a deep shade of raspberry, causing those freckles he liked to count like stars to all but disappear. The troll was sure he was just as eager, though frankly he was much more intrigued by his matesprit's desperate mewls in a series of varying Germanics.  
"Babe, you know I don't know what you're saying." Silenced reigned for a heartbeat, before Hetalia attempted coherent English.  
"H-Homestuck... P-P-Please just..."  
"Just what? Hey 'Talia, have I ever told you how pretty you look like this, flushed like a cherry and begging for me?"  
"D-Dios mio... J-J-Just p-please _fuck me_ " He'd been waiting for that. Homestuck's words were breathy into Hetalia's ear.  
"Why didn't ya say so sweetie? Now put your face in the fucking pillow." Hetalia does so and fuck he's even hotter like this, on display for him. A smirk plays on his lips as he aligns himself. They'd done this before of course, and Homestuck knows well enough that the genetic fluid leaking from his nook would work well enough as lube in itself. Even if it wasn't quite enough, he thinks as he applies the stuff, his matesprit is a dirty slut and can tolerate a little pain. Without much more warning than a grunted

"You ready?" and a quick nod from Hetalia he is already deep inside him, causing a sharp breath and a long moan that is _damn_ hot. He is about to start pulling back out when his matesprit lets out a whine, which causes him to stop.

"Something wrong, babe?" Homestuck's voice is low, as he is trying to hold back whatever odd sound he would've been making, so as to speak somewhat clearly. Hetalia's voice is muffled against the pillow, and the one word is cut short by a loud groan as he shifts about.

"S-sudden." He stops to let himself adjust somewhat, little gasps and moans escaping kiss-swollen lips as Homestuck's bulge won't stop writhing inside him and it feels so weird but _so good._ He waits another moment for uttering another word, attempting to keep a stable tone of voice.

" _ **Idō.**_ " Snarky as ever, even in the situation at hand Homestuck replies.

"Sorry, I don't speak much Japanese. Speak clearer babe."

"M-m-m-" as he attempts to speak, his boyfriend brushes that curl on the side of his head, causing Hetalia to collapse into a moaning, gibberish mess.

"I'm just teasing, I know what you want." His voice is low and husky in Hetalia's ear. His movements are jerky as he pulls back out, and upon hearing his matesprit's whine at the removal, thrusts back in, slower this time. Hetalia's moans might even be louder than when he initially put it in, and now he's started grunting too. He soon picks up a steady in-out in-out rhythm and he can hardly hear when his matesprit moans "G-go _faster,_ " and he does so with no hesitation. Now Hetalia's breaths are coming quicker, having given up on verbal commands once he'd slipped into Greek and couldn't seem to get an English word in around moans, groans and loud " _sklirótera_ "s. That was another thing Homestuck loved about his matesprit. When he was turned on enough, his gift of languages would short out in a way, giving way to screams in tongues Homestuck had given up on trying to figure out, which was adorable and unbearably sexy, to be frank. Time seemed to pass in a blur of salacious words and a growing coil of heat at his core that grew more scalding with each thrust and ragged breath that escaped either of them. After what seemed like minutes upon minutes trapped within a personal infinity, Hetalia's muffled voice could be heard underneath him.

"Kuso, kuso, kuso, H-Homestuck-"

"What?" Even while riding on the edge, he had to tease somewhat.

"W-watashi wa tai tsumoridesu-" His words were short and breathless and still indecipherable. Homestuck was, of course, panting just as hard as he replied.

"S-speak English doll, I can't he-help you if I don't know what y-you're saying."

"H-Homestuck, ich- _I'm_ gonna-" What he had planned to say next came out too quiet to hear, though the point came across clear as day.

"Then do it."

He did.

As such, Homestuck slipped over the edge just behind him, and with a loud, shuddering groan, the bedsheets were stained electric emerald. He slowly pulled out from his matesprit.

A few moments passed in silence, the room utterly void of sound with the exception of quick, hard, breaths giving way to softer, if not slightly shaky ones until the sound of his boyfriend flopping down next to him rang in Hetalia's ears. He could feel silvery arms snake around him from behind, but insisted on saying nothing. The silence was truly broken however, when Homestuck spoke again, lazy words filling his ears even though he wasn't really listening at all. Only the tail end of what had been said reached his ears, and the half slurred "flushed for you" was all he found himself able to reply to.

"Ti amo."

(1st phone call is Norwegian:  
"We'd love to come! So Friday at 9:00 then?"  
"Sounds good, I'm so excited!"  
"It's been nice talking to you too, goodbye!")

(2nd phone call is Italian  
"Really? How is it? I wish I could've been there, it sounds really fun!"

"I'm pretty sure my boyfriend is listening right now. I'm so sorry, can I call back later?"

"Thank you, bye.")

(Irish: "What gave you the idea that you could listen in on my phone conversations?")

(Italian Again: "Why don't you remove the pillow, yes?"

"Isn't that better babe?")

(French: I want you to take your shirt off for me, okay?"

"Take off your pants now.)

(Portuguese: "What? Do you like this?")

(Dutch: "I WANT YOU TO FUCK ME IN THE ASS WITH YOUR TENTACLE DICK RIGHT NOW. PLEASE, PLEASE, OH GOD STOP TEASING AND FUCK ME RAW.")

(Japanese: " _ **Move.**_ ")

(Greek: " _Harder")_

(Japanese again: "Fuck, fuck, fuck

"I'm going to-")

(Italian one more time: "I love you.")


End file.
